There was a party. The party had: members of Congress, hounds, pomegrante vodka cocktails. The party only played Bob Seger, at the party.
Bob Seger himself came. He was crying and had wind in his beard. He could not believe all the things that had happened to him, nor all the feelings that the things inspired. He picked up a small girl in a starched white dress. He gave her piggy back rides while the congressmen looking on, frowning. Then he gave the girl some free lotion. The girl liked Bob Seger and thought he was very good at making lotion.
The congressmen felt ambivalent about the party, but then they started drinking! They were like, whoa, I can’t believe how drunk I am. They were like, I’m going to make out with Bobby. No, no, said the other congressmen. Don’t do it! I will, said the congressmen, just watch me. They went up to Bobby and started flirting but then got embarrassed and ran away. The other congressmen watching were like, OMG, ha ha ha. Bobby was worried, because he thought maybe they were making fun of him.
The congressmen were like, let’s go in the bathroom and put on lipstick and nailpolish and tie our shirts in knots under our breasts so we look like sluts. The other congressmen were like, okay! Then George Stephanopolous wanted to come, and they were like, you’re not a congressmen, but they let him come anyway. They dressed up sooo slutty and then came back out into the party and all the animals were shocked! But they laughed! And Bob Seger picked them up and gave them all piggy back rides, because that was what they really wanted anyway.
THE (happy) END